A Christian friend of mine posted an earth shattering statement on his Facebook page, it invoked what I would consider to be a callous response from the religious community. To openly express one's true feeling as, "I wish I were dead", is taboo in our modernistic and agnostic society. Condemnation is often used to suppress these type of feelings. We are surrounded by those who consider self-sacrifice to be an honorable pursuit, yet, one of the greatest contradiction in the world of Christianity prevails, "we all want to go to Heaven, but we don't want to die."
There is a failure within our society to address the suffering inflicted upon members of society by society itself. There is also a failure within the religious community to address the suffering that is inflicted upon members of the religious community by the religious community itself. Even medical science with its glorious array of skill has been known to create personalities, without the will to survive. Society is turning on itself, the gates has been left open and the sheep of God's pasture is straying. While many of us are suffering in silence, we are encouraged to let the government or God solve our problems. The government throws money at the problem in an inefficient manner while the organized church adopts a position of apathy or indifference as it collects the money and promise the intercession of God.
I responded to my friends words by saying I could relate to his words, there have been many times in my life, I have silently and sometimes verbally said the same thing. The saddest thing about these expressions are those that hear them or read them, few, even church members have any clue as to how to respond. The first response from the religious right is a rebuke and tossing a lot of scripture about, which is about as effective as telling me to pray and God will give me one million dollars. Condemnation is next to follow, the person who is suffering from a traumatic medical experience, reversal of fortune or other hardships of life is made to feel even more pain because of the rejection he received from baring his inner soul. As an enlightened society, we are not prepared to hear someone utter the words, “I wish I were dead”. We label these as “suicidal thoughts”, and programs are instituted to suppress these thoughts. The effectiveness of these programs is yet to be seen, the suicide rate is climbing.
When calling the VA hospital for medical treatment, embedded in the menu of options are, "If you are having thought of suicide", then you are presented with a course of action. Following the prescribed course of action often subject the person to a more traumatic experience. A person who takes a drink to suppress his pain must admit he is an alcoholic in order to receive help. A person who is suffering mental pains must subscribe to the theory of the "functioning idiot" to receive the needed help. In the church, you must endure the stigma of doubting Thomas, a person whose faith is weak.
Those who profess to have a knowledge of dealing with these type of situations often finds themselves lacking when it comes to dealing with this type of loneliness. (Notice I did not say sickness) Being able to talk to someone who will listen without being judgmental is helpful, but it often does not solve the problem. Scriptures are often tossed about as if this will heal our wounds, but the source of much of my pain emulated from those who stand in the pulpit every Sunday and supposedly preach a fresh message from God. The sheep of the pasture are straying because the church has become too involved in “praising God” and preparing for the pastor’s banquet. Where is that pastor or minister that you can call, anytime, day or night, who will leave their bible on the top shelf and help you deal with the harsh realities of your life. Where is that person who profess to be following Christ who is willing to help you bear your infirmities?
I underwent extreme cancer treatment, so speaking to me of joy coming in the morning of this life or things is going to get better does not apply to my life anymore. Naturally speaking, things are not going to get better for me, they are going to get worst. I do not pray for the healing virtues of God to flow, I merely pray that God's will be done. Medical science has presented me with a new type or form of existence, a type of existence that is alien to most. The church that we have supported down through the ages should be the foundation of our survival but, it has rescinded its position back to God, and the only support forthcoming from the church is, “God is able” or “God is good”. God intended for man to do certain things themselves and we are supposed to help one another. Where is that help for the “lost sheep” and why are they straying from the fold? Listening to a person in a fancy robe tone up might take my mind of my predicament for a moment, the same as going to a football game, but tomorrow is coming.
Those of us who are suffering are encouraged to make prayer requests and stand in prayer lines as we strive to build a type of hope that will sustain us through tomorrow. The proliferation of the church and the use of prayer as a fix for all of our problems is instrumental in destroying the hope or faith of many. We are indoctrinated into a type of prayer that do not closely resemble the model prayer Jesus gave his disciple. We are taught to be like spoiled brats coming before God begging. There appear to be no help in the organize religious community, if has become caught up in pomp and pageantry, worship service has evolved into a type of "praise and play" that borderlines on a form of idolatry.
The first step to surviving this traumatic experience is to find somebody that you can talk to. Somebody that you can talk does not always translate into a pastor or church member or even a therapist. Someone who not only is willing to sit down and listen, but to become involved in your life even when you slam the door in their face. Someone who is able to listen without condemnation, from a position of servitude, rather than a position of superiority. Someone who is not afraid of getting their hands dirty as they walk with you as Christ did on a journey that will be unfamiliar yet fulfilling the words of Christ. Pray is an important asset that must be used to obtain the fruit of the spirit. Most of all surround yourself with friends as I did, who realize God works through each of us, not those who encourages you to sit on the sideline and wait for God to pick you up, as they drive past. Find that person who pious attitude does not prevent them from saying, “Brother what can I do to help”, and follow it up with action.
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